Planning for the Tailgate Begins

With less then a month away, its easy to lose focus on daily activities and drift to the opening day tailgate. So far, it looks like it’ll be a great one. So I figured, with the menu pretty much solidified, here are a bunch of questions to consider:

Me?

Sangria: White or Red? Traditionally, I’ve been bringing red sangria until last year when I switched over. Likely, I’ll go towards white, to avoid the red stains on the new jerseys which will be distributed to the idiots from my spelunking trip to the Nike outlet on the eastern most tip of Long Island. And, will I actually remember this home opener?

Joey?

Traditionally, Joey doesn’t bail on the opening day festivities. Too much food and stories he can relate to others. But he always keeps us in limbo. Watching for him driving in with his convertible is not much different then watching the beginning of the old Batman series and wondering whether Batgirl would ride across on her Batcycle. Though admittedly, I was more excited to see Batgirl appear on the show. No offense, Joey.

Brian?

Will it still be possible for Brian to email us pictures of boobs even when he’s at the tailgate?

Ofer?

More than anything, Ofer and his kids hope opening day falls after April 15th, so they don’t phone in how many burgers to hold as they try and make the kickoff. So we all wonder who will end up paying more taxes because Ofer had to come to the game (and it better not be me).

Greg?

The chance of Greg sending in the letter for reinstatement is about the equivalent of Woly being drafted by Chelsea. So, will he show up, or will he simply swear and guarantee 200% that he’ll be there only to Greg out at the final minute.

Paul?

Life’s too short to not try a steak at Spark’s or Smith and Wolensky’s, or a tailgate depleting meat product from Paul’s butcher.

Kofsky?

The idiots will be introduced to Kofsky’s chile. Is it such a good idea that we all sit so close together during the game? Do we try and coordinate an effort or something for the end of the “Charge” cheer on the Jumbotron?

Aguardiente

Will Keith have enough memory cards to capture enough pictures of Annette as she drops off the Empanada King? Ah yeah.

Running out of Beer

Admittedly, it happened some time ago, but our official bottle opener is trying hard to erase his fumble following his challenge to the idiots. Ever since his infatuation with Metro the Dog/Panda, Keith has made sure that he doesn’t run out of beer just in case he needs to be “drunk enough” in the event he runs into Metro outside the stadium. Also, does the “I’ll wear a wig if the King of Goals score” promise still hold?

Jumbalaya

It has quickly become an idiot favorite so lets just all cross our fingers that Wendy lets Jason come.