The King and I

Louis XIV. Elvis. Eric Cantona. Kevin James.

Our history has been filled with devotion to men who have been nicknamed the King. So, when Sergio Galvan Rey, aka, "The King of Goals" joined the Metros this year, I knew that I had to jump on the bandwagon before it inevitably got too crowded. Why Sergio Galvan Rey, you may ask? Well, I feel a special affinity for the King. Both of us joined the Metros community this year. He has a haircut from the 1980's; I wish that I still had my hair from the 1980s. He played in the powerhouse Boca Juniors youth football program; I played in the powerhouse East Midwood Jewish Center youth basketball program. Also, after the heartwarming success story that was Lothar Matthaus, I knew that the Metros had the golden touch when it came to international signings.

Unfortunately, the parallels continued once the season started. We both have had spotty attendance at the games and have been huge disappointments to Ronen. I hurt my back and the King has often played like he's carrying a piano on his. Ever the optimist, in anticipation of the flurry of goals which will soon take place, I have decided to provide weekly game summary for the King. He will be rated on a scale of 0-4 headbands, and I will periodically throw in a fun fact or two about the King.

King Report: With a depleted roster, the King came on at the start of the second half of a scoreless tie, replacing the ineffective (and injured) Cornell Glen. The King had a pretty good game. A couple of minutes into the second half, he followed up a blocked shot with a nice back heel pass in the box. Later, he was open in front of the net, but Tenywa Bonseu's cross was too hot to handle, and the King barely got his head on the ball, which drifted wide. In the last few minutes, the King did a great job trapping a long ball by the goal line, and had a great back pass to Mike McGee, which led to nothing. The King was also active on defense. Most importantly, for the first time, the King went without his trademark headband, having obviously taken advantage of Supercuts' $5 mullet special.

King Stats: 45 minutes, three shots, two back heels and 0 headbands.

King Rating (out of four):

King Fact: The last club which the King played for before the Metros was Once Caldas. Coincidentally, in 14 games for the Metros, the King has scored exactly Once.